What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?
Last Updated: 21.06.2025 11:48
He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.
She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.
Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..
'There's a huge amount that we don't understand': Why sperm is still so mysterious - BBC
Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.
I had hoped to write a book about this .
So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.
Why is Canada letting too many Indians in Canada?
I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.
I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.
I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.
Is there an MBTI personality that is more or less likely to handle stress?
But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!
The only rule us 5 kids had .
He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.
How long did it take you to get used to your CPAP machine?
We could never speak unless he spoke to us!
He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.
She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!
Turning carbon dioxide into fuel just got easier, thanks to acid bubbles - Tech Xplore
He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .
His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!
I was seconnd youngest,
How or what is the best way to make a hot rail device? Anddd goooo 👀👀
Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.
I was writing from the time i was a small child.
Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.
Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.
Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.
The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..
Sarepta reports second patient death after treatment with Duchenne gene therapy - statnews.com
I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.
Thats was my nicest nick name for him
I of course replied” arh beautiful!
So whats the point in blame.
I said to her
He was dying to do it , i knew.
What questions are asked in a JP Morgan Hirevue interview?
She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.
I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.
He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!
How do you feel about the singer Taylor Swift endorsing Kamala Harris for president?
But, we were locked up after school.
And who doesn’t know suffering?
Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!
Where can I sell naked pics of myself online?
I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor
And i lived it daily.
I never cut or harmed myself..
10-year Treasury yield rises ahead of key jobs report - CNBC
With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.
I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)
Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life
The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,
But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!
Was to survive, this bastard.
Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.
My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.
We all went to grammer schools
Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t
Especially a lifetime of it.
Its mostly always from childhood abuse .
He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!
We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!
My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.
Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!
I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .
The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.
My family never makes their pension either.
And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)
Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..
One cannot hold on to bitterness.
I think the readers, may guess!
His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.
Why did i forgive my father ?
And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .
Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..
It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.
He resisted the act ,that day.
When she asked me how she looked .
It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.
Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.
Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.
Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.
She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!
As i do to all so called friends.?
And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!
But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.
Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?
As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!
Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.
My mum and dad in the seventies!
What did i know ?
And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.
That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.
She married twice! .
But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !
(And it was in our own minds.)
Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!
I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.
It was going to be , some day.
As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)
I don,t even have a pension.
We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..
He knew the spot.
And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!
But im an empath, and i help lots of people.
But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).
One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.
I waited trembling.
I did it because my mum asked me too!
Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other
He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.
But im dying ,and its too late for me.
You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .
One cannot live in the past .
So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.
And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!
But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,
Another so called friend had bit the dust..
And, all my friends down the years ,where users.
He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!
.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them
Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.
Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.
Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.
As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.
Ive learnt so much.
I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!
I could never make a relationship work though!
Where the ultimate outsiders.
Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.
I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!
My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.
She wouldn,t have been !
I know ,a lot about trauma.
Put me off passion for life!!
My life is so biszare .
Who then, do I blame.?
Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.
When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!
As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.
She died at 55 of colon cancer.
I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.
Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.
All the time i was locked up.
Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.
She was in good health!
One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.
My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.
She loved him until the end.
We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.
I couldn’t, believe it.
Im still living with it.
I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.
Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)
She was a women, a mother with her own children!.
Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!
He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!
I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.
I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.
He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.
They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?
I will be 64.
We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.
You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.
My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!
BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.
Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.
I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.
I write beautiful poetry .
She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!
Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.
I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers
The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!
For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)
At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.
On the 31st of Jan this month .
He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!
I was very sick at this time too.
Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years
I might have to go back 30 generations or more..
I have no regrets .
One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)
I was scared of men, in general
Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!
But ive been too sick for many years..
19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.
Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..
They are buried together, in the same grave..
We were not on the streets..
This is how, and why children get BPD.
I suffer greatly, because of BPD..
I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.
But it wasn’t much.
This is soul school!.
5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.
My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .
But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!
Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.
And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!
A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.
As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!
I was 9 years of age.
She found it foreign!.
Would this be the day?
Im dying but, im not bitter.
Comes on , in middle age.
Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.
So, i spoilt her more .
But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .